Halo

I found a way to let you in but i never really had a doubt,

I'm excited i get to see a close friend on sunday before he leaves to the filpines, you know i never really felt the feeling of losing someone, my friend's who lost family members i mourn with them not feeling what they've felt it, and when sometimes when it comes to my friends crying over losing their friends i just chuckle at them. Jokes on me now right? I'm finally losing someone really dear to me in my life, yea i guess 8th grade when my friends either went to SC high and Wilcox high, but this is something way different. Aaron laeving to me is the feeling one would get when they lose their family in a tragic drunk driving incident. I didn't cry when i lost my great grandma, i didnt cry when i lost alot of my friends to the high school scene, and i didnt even cry when i found out the truth of my father. Yet i cry when i think of him leaving.
I know what it feels like to lose someone, now when i see a friend cry over thier dad who died, i can cry with them,

Ha i've been told it's not goodbye it's just a "see you later"
4 years :\, For my 16th birthday all i want him to do is to stay a few extra day's so we can hang, i was hoping he wouldnt leave until like july. You see those people at the airport screaming crying, bawling over their family, haha you can see where i'm going with this.Ii would travel into the departure gate running like my life depended on it, knowning that if i didnt get it off my chest i wouldnt be happy the 4 years you were gone, i would run to you just to say.. i love you
Other than that, Life has been unmotivating, i have no motivation to do anything eat, sleep do homework, ok maybe socialize a little, but i get this weird feeling, the feeling where you wake up from sleeping, i wake up finding myself with the same music on Replay, and myself unhappy ready to have an anxiety attack, because i'm trying to find something fun to do
=_=

Saturday-santa cruz? homework?
Sunday- baby shower with aaron?